Our Little Hero turns 8

For a child who wasn't supposed to live past a few days old (even shorter since we had no idea he had a heart defect), 7 and a half years is an amazing feat. Today, well, this morning at 1:24am, Weston celebrated his 1st birthday in Heaven. In my mind, I know it he is having a ball with his best friend, Megan. He is getting the yummiest goodies and having the best time. Here on earth is a little different. My heart hurts. I can only liken it to that feeling when you get the breath knocked out of you-except it happens at just the thought of him. We asked people to wear RED in honor of Weston's bday and we have been overwhelmed with the response. You all make life easier for us just by showing us how much he was loved. We raised 901 dollars in honor of him and donated it to the rediothon. Check out the vignette that WOGL put together here (you need some tissues)https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_h63Z-R1xnqbnRyUkZTeDVCQ2M/edit?usp=sharing People keep asking how we are doing. I am still not sure how to respond. We get through the days. We seem happy. We are doing "normal" family things. It is the blending in that I struggle with. How do you try to be normal after such an abnormal few years? I think God an I have an understanding. It is just going to take me awhile to get through this heartache and find my way again. My belief in God is still strong but I always felt like I could get through anything with God-like he carried us for the last few years. And now, I kind of feel dropped, disheveled, abandoned, and unsure of what to do next. Why am I in so much pain if God loves me so much? Then, there is that now so normal feeling of having the breath knocked out of me because the pain is so intense. And then, I see reminders that Weston is with me everywhere I go now and his life in Heaven is much greater and richer than anything we could have given him here. We asked folks to wear red today in honor of Weston and to spread awareness for Congenital Heart Defects and Pulmonary Hypertension. Both are so important to us. Please continue to keep our family in your thoughts and prayers. The kids are so excited to have a party for Weston in Heaven today.