I take myself back everyday-maybe it is torture or therapy-I really don't know. I look back because I want to gaze at your sweet, steroid filled face and look at your sweetest smile. As we near your one year Angel-versary, I realize that next year, I won't be looking at the same things. How have we been a family for an entire year without you, my Little Prince?
On your Angel-versary, on Earth, we plan to Feed the Fire. We want to feed the firemen and police heroes that have made such an impact on you life. We are overwhelmed by the generosity of others because THEY have made this happen. AMAZING!
Yesterday, we were able to meet one of your fav nurses dad's. It was AMAZING. He may have never been able to meet you in life but hugging him just made me feel like he was so in touch with you. Maybe I miss Philly more than I ever can admit. And then, maybe it isn't Philly, maybe it is just you.
I miss your jokes. I miss the creepy thing you had on the back of your bathroom door to scare me. I miss your crazy tastes in food that caused me to order out from a zillion different places. I miss your grocery lists. I miss you.
Not a day makes my pain any better. It is unreal. I see so much of you in Kinley. I have no doubt that you loved on her before I got to hold her.
I never thought, more than a year after transplant, that this is the celebration we would be planning. Not once. Not ever. But here we are. I hope that on your Angel-versary, you roller-skate through Heaven giving out lollipops, ice cream cones, and Flaming Hot Cheetos with you best friend Megan. I hope that Papaw Mitchell, my grandma and grandpa, and my dad are there to cheer you on every minute. Go wild sweet prince! Enjoy it! Happy Angel-versary!!!
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